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VITA BREVIS
Hailey, one of my closest friends, is in the throes of yet another relationship saga. For no apparent reason, she times these 'crucial', nerve-wracking, 'decisions' right smack in the middle of finals papers in law school. Anyone who's ever known law students, or been one, would know just how frazzled the lot can get during end of term. Personally, I like to hibernate in my house, turn off my mobile phone to ward off callers, and basically NOT resurface until the actual exam day. Not Hailey. The woman gives real meaning to the word 'multi-tasking'. Hahaha...
Tidbits from last night's phone call:
Hailey: I went out with him again last night.
Angel: That's great. See? I just KNEW you liked him, even if you were denying it to death. *laughing* I could literally hear the smile on your voice when you called me up last week from Subic.
Hailey: *laughs* Yeah yeah...But, but I'm getting confused because HE invited me to dinner.
Angel: The other one?
Hailey: Yeah, and HE was the reason I sort of broke it off with him.
Angel: *laughing* Here we go again. Why don't you suspend deciding on this for now...well at least until after we get slaughtered in Succession?
Hailey: Why can't I just MAKE the perfect guy???
Angel: That is SUCH a typical 'large taxpayers' reply. *grinning*
Hailey: Yeah yeah. Spoiled brat. Whatever. *laughing*
Ask any woman and she'll always have an ideal man lurking somewhere in the back of her mind even when she's dating someone. A tall order, I know, and probably not that fair to the guy (even if we know he has an ideal woman lurking somewhere in the back of his mind too. hahaha.). Maybe I'm just a bit jaded, but looking for the perfect 'one' is like comparing Michelangelo's 'Pieta' to a comic strip. It's a futile exercise. No matter how wonderful the person you're seeing is, all you'll end up seeing are his glaring deviations from the ideal. Chasing mirages, from a relationship standpoint, may seem pointless.
But sometimes we forget that mirage-chasing, or dreaming, is just as pleasurable to the chaser/dreamer as it is to one who succeeds in realizing the mirage/dream. Maybe all that the mirage-chaser needs to be happy with what she has is to know that the mirage is a possible reality...and she's not short-changing herself, or just plain old 'settling' for someone?
Well, for all these years I've known Hailey, that's the only plausible theory I can come up with. Time to go back to hibernating.
Fide.
Angel Fidelis
P.S. Have a song I can't get out of my head right now, "Like A Friend" by Pulp, from the soundtrack of 'Great Expectations'. Hails, this is YOUR fault. *laughing* This is YOUR song.
"Don't bother saying sorry
Why don't you come in?
Smoke all my cigarettes -- again.
Every time I get no further
How long has it been?
Come on in now
Wipe your feet on my dreams...
You take up my time
Like some cheap magazine
When I could have been
Learning something,
Well, you know what I mean.
I've done this before
And will do it again
C'mon and kill me baby
Whilst you smile like a friend
And I'll come running
Just to do it again...
You are that last drink I never should have drunk
You are the body hidden in the trunk
You are the habit I can't seem to kick
You are my secrets on the front page every week.
You are the car I never should have bought
You are the train I never should have caught
You are the cut that makes me hide my face
You are the party that makes me feel my age
Like a car crash I can see but I just can't avoid
Like a plane I've been told I never should board
Like a film that's so bad but
I've just got to stay 'til the end
Let me tell you ---
it's lucky for you that we're friends."